Title:Moving On Author: Jules Part:1/1 Pairing: Nick/Chris Rating:PG (for language) Feedback: Yes Please - mailto:slash_me_baby@yahoo.com Warning: Slash Warning. Bi-groupal Warning Disclaimer:None of it is true. All fiction Moving On by Jules Chris always seemed to have this thing for blonde eyed, blue haired, tall, younger men. Giggling, he ran that thought through his almost drunk mind one last time. Something didn't seem right. Blonde eyed blue haired? No. Blonde haired, blue eyed. That's what it was. And Nick Carter was definitely that. Blonde haired, blue eyed, tall and younger. A lot younger. Granted, he was older than Justin, but it was only by a year and that wasn't all that much. Tipping his glass to his lips, Chris found that he had already drained it and was sucking at air. Annoyed, he set the glass down and surveyed the room around him, wondering where the closest bar was so he could get another. As he began to weave his way through the crowd of people he didn't know, but could already tell he didn't like, Chris found himself face to face with a frowning JC, hands on his hips and head tilted to the side. "You're drunk." JC observed and Chris rolled his eyes. "Good eye Einstein. What the fuck else am I going to do here but drink? The show's not all that entertaining for me." Chris tried to push past him but JC was taller. And not drunk. And Chris could barely get him to move out of his way. For a skinny little bastard, JC could be pretty strong when he wanted. Taking a deep breath, Chris decided to go around him rather than through him. He made it about a half a step before he felt himself being pulled back, again finding himself face to face with a very pissed off JC. "What do you want from me?" Chris sighed, defeated. There must have been something in the whine that accompanied Chris' question because JC's expression softened and he loosened his grip on Chris' arm. "I know it's hard for you. But you have to look at it from the other side. Maybe it's better that things ended between you too. I mean, you know how Justin is, the centre of his own universe." "Easy for you to fucking say Josh. It's not you that has to go home to an empty house, sleep in a bed that's too big for you and still laced with the scent of the one person that used to be the centre of YOUR universe." Chris spat. The venom in his voice surprised even himself. He rubbed his tired eyes and took a few calming breaths, not wanting to get into it right then and there. With hundreds of people around. With the one person he wasn't sure if he wanted there or not just a few feet away with his new 'boyfriend'. Of course Justin claimed that they were just friends, but Chris and he had been 'just friends' for three years, so Chris knew that just friends was the cover for 'the guy I'm fucking at least twice a day and no one but our best friends know about it.' Looking straight into JC's eyes, he saw the taller man's eyes looking at something over his shoulder. JC's expression changed to confusion and Chris moved to turn around, stopped only by the solid mass directly behind him. "Hey." JC said slowly, pulling Chris forward so he could turn around and gasp, the alcohol completely fucking with his head. "Chasez. Chris." "Nick." It was nearly a whisper and Chris tried not to react to the man standing directly in front of him. He had to remind himself that he was still hurting from Justin, although it had been 8 months since they broke up and Justin had already moved on. Twice. But as Chris' heart raced and his stomach did this crazy flippy things that used to only be reserved for Justin, he wondered if maybe it was the alcohol or just the fact that Nick was absolutely beautiful. And smiling at him, as if he was expecting him to say something. Chris turned to face JC and found him looking at him with the same expression on his face. "What?" He asked, trying to shake the alcohol out of his system, suddenly wishing he hadn't had that last few

		rum and cokes. "I asked how you were doing? What you've been up to." Nick repeated, eyes twinkling and lips curved in a small smile. As if he knew Chris had been staring at him. Wanting him. "Oh.. You know. Stuff. I don't really want to get into anything too serious while we're on hiatus. This is time for me to relax, not work myself to death." Chris said honestly, shrugging his shoulders. He watched Nick nod his head in complete understanding, although he didn't know how the blonde could identify with that. He had his boat racing that he did. The solo album that was soon to be released. Plus Chris had heard of talks of Nick going on tour with Aaron. Nick wouldn't know the meaning of vacation if Chris had have written it out for him. And as this ran through Chris' hazy mind, he realized he knew way too much about Nick's extra curriculars. That thought would have scared the hell out of him if he could think of anything other than Nick's gaze focused directly on him. "Yeah I hear you. I wish I could do that. Just take time out and chill. Ya know? But I can't. I get bored ....antsy and need to be doing something." Nick smiled at him and Chris realized that he was the sole focus of Nick's attention. He hadn't looked at JC once except to say hello, and even then Chris figured that he barely looked at him. "Well. I think since no one really cares about me, I'm gonna go now." JC spoke, sensing his third wheel status. He paused to see if his absence would go noticed. It didn't. Sighing he resigned himself to the fact that if Chris was talking to Nick, he wasn't drinking. And that was good enough for him. Chris felt rather bad, but he barely acknowledged his band mate leaving. He was completely captivated by the way Nick was staring at him. It wasn't in a creepy way that made Chris' skin crawl, but more of an acute awareness of the chemistry between them. Nick looked at Chris like he was the only person in the room, and to Chris, Nick WAS the only person in the room. That should have been a warning sign for him, but he didn't care. This was the first time anyone had made him forget that the all and powerful Justin Timberlake was in the room and he decided he liked that. Maybe that's what he needed. "So I hear you and the Diva broke up." Nick said softly, his brow furrowed. And suddenly the bubble had been burst. If there could have been anything Nick could say to ruin the moment, that was it. His face fell and Chris was quickly reminded that he needed more alcohol. "Yeah. Well it's been nice talking to you Nick, but I need..." Nick acted quickly, grabbing onto Chris' arm as he spun around to walk away in the other direction. "I'm sorry Chris. Please don't go." Chris' skin burned where Nick's fingers were wrapped around his wrist and he pulled back quickly. "Just ...don't." Slowly he turned around, his heart pounding in his ears as he saw the look on Nick's face. Nick's eyes were filled with apologies, his lower lip caught between his teeth. The younger man looked so sorry that Chris couldn't find the energy to be pissed. "Yeah. About 8 months ago." Nick nodded solemnly and Chris knew he wanted to say something. They simply stared at one another for a few minutes before Nick opened his mouth. "I think it's for the better Chris. Not something you probably want to hear, but it's something I wanted to say. That's why I came over. I'll leave you alone now." It was Chris' turn to call for Nick to stop. As if someone had turned a switch on in his mind, Chris felt completely sober, everything coming into focus around him. His head was suddenly clear, but he had no idea what the tone in Nick's voice meant. "What's that supposed to mean?" "What's what supposed to mean?" "That you think it's for the better. Why did you say that? How would you know?" Chris saw Nick blush and look around, shaking his head. "Just an observation." They stood maybe five feet from one another, neither making any move to go closer or to leave. Chris knew they couldn't have this conversation in the open, but there was something in the way Nick was looking at him that he knew there was more to it. He ran a shaky hand through his spikes and looked around. Out of the corner of his eye he watched Justin with his 'friend' in the corner, faces curiously close to one another. As if they were sharing a secret. It was like a knife through his heart watching Justin like this in public. They had never been this close when out at parties like this, the younger man always afraid that people would suspect anything. It appeared that with this new boy toy, Justin had no reservations. He focused his attention back on Nick and saw that he too had caught Justin's display in the corner. It appeared that Nick had also witnessed his reaction to the sight and he shook his head. "See Chris. You deserve better..." That was it for Chris. He needed to know exactly what the fuck Nick was talking about, and

		making a split decision, he stepped in closer, grabbed Nick's arm tightly in his hand and pulled him towards the patio, hoping that there would be somewhere quiet they could talk. Chris jumped slightly when Nick pulled his arm out of his grasp, and moved to take his hand in his own, threading their fingers together. They were now holding hands and Chris turned back to look at the smile on Nick's face, the way his eyes danced. That made Chris smile and his stomach flip. Something that, when he fully allowed himself to think about the last few months with Justin, even his boyfriend hadn't been able to do to him. Chris couldn't even remember the last time anyone made his stomach do somersaults with just a smile, and he again had to remind himself that he was finished with blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, younger men. They were nothing but the fastest way to break a heart, and Chris wasn't ready to break this one just yet. It was still on the mend and he wasn't too eager to lease it out. Thankfully, Chris found a spot on the patio that was empty, grabbing a seat and motioning for Nick to do the same. "What the fuck did you mean by that?" He said, not clarifying which part of Nick's statement he was talking about. He wanted to see what Nick would say without him prompting him. Nick took a deep breath and sat back in his chair, looking up at the sky. "I don't want to get into a big debate or anything. I just wanted you to know that I think you're better off without him." Chris could see that Nick was nervous and this unnerved him. He didn't know what the blonde had to be nervous about. It wasn't like Chris had a nasty temper like Joey, so he must have known that Chris wouldn't hurt him. And he wouldn't cause a scene like Justin was known to, but Nick still seemed unsettled and refused to meet Chris' eyes. "Why? How would you know?" "I saw the way you would look at him. But I also saw the way he looked at you." "And?" "They were two different looks Chris. You would look at him like he was the only thing in the world. Like you were lost, but he was your light. You looked at him like he was everything." Chris blushed as Nick spoke, realizing how right he was. That's how he did look at Justin because that's how he'd felt. And when Justin decided that what they'd had was fun but he was ready to move on, that light went out and Chris found himself submerged in darkness. "And? What was Justin's look?" He wasn't sure if he wanted the answer, but he had to ask. The softness in Nick's tone, the comfort in the hand that had made it's way to Chris' thigh, just sitting there in a not sexual way but more of a 'I'm here for you' way, gave him the assurance that Nick wasn't there to hurt him. "His look was ...vacant." Nick looked like he was contemplating what to say, figuring out how to word it. "Like he was looking right through you, to whoever else was around. Sometimes I wondered if he even knew you were there." Chris reacted as if he'd been kicked in the gut and Nick stopped, his face suddenly sad. "I'm sorry. It's not my place..." "No. Please don't stop." Chris' voice was strangled and full of emotion. "I ...it's just good to hear someone else say it. I ... I always thought the same thing but he'd always tell me he loved me and that I was imagining it. And the guys were always telling me I needed to trust Justin's love and decision that he wanted to be with me. But ...you ..you saw it?" Nick nodded his head slowly, his hand now squeezing Chris' thigh comfortingly. "It was so clear that where you were giving 100 percent, he wasn't." "But .... You ....you were paying that much attention to us? Our relationship?" Chris asked, suddenly realizing the weight of Nick's observations. If Nick could see that, he must have been paying close attention to his and Justin's relationship. He could see Nick's blush even in the dim light of the patio and held back a small smile. "Yeah. Well... People don't really engage me in enlightening conversation at these types of parties. I'm the dumb blonde one, so while they talk to Kevin or Howie about 'important' stuff, I zone out. Plus I sort of had a direct interest in your relationship." Nick shrugged and Chris knew he was trying to play it off as nothing. "It's clear that you're the type of person that's in it for the long haul. That you put your whole heart in it, and he's not. The most important person in Justin's life is Justin. And you need someone who will make you the most important person in their life. You deserve someone who will put you first." Chris swallowed hard at how deep Nick's voice suddenly got, how serious his face was. It was as if he was studying Chris. Memorizing the moment. And Chris wondered if Nick could be that person. Against his better judgment, he wanted Nick to be that person. He wanted to be the centre of Nick's universe. To be the one to make those pouty lips curl into a huge smile, to make him giggle and laugh out loud until they were both crying. He wanted to be the one to make Nick moan in pleasure and sigh in contentment. And he wanted Nick to do the same to him. As his eyes searched Nick's for a clue of what he was thinking, he felt Nick doing the same to him.

		"Are you over him?" Nick asked suddenly, surprising Chris. He had to think about that question for a few minutes. He thought he was, but being at the party tonight had brought back feelings he'd thought he'd long since buried. But now sitting with Nick he wasn't so sure about anything anymore. Apparently he'd taken too long because he heard Nick sigh and remove his hand. Chris shrugged and shook his head, indicating he wasn't sure if he was over Justin and in his confused mind, he knew that was the truth. Before he could react, Nick was suddenly a lot closer than he had been, their faces inches apart. Their eyes were locked and Chris had no idea what the blonde was going to do, out there on the patio with people no less than 10 feet away. Justin never would have done this for fear of getting caught. And if he did take a chance and show Chris any affection in public, he'd always duck his head to see if anyone was looking and then do it, making sure to be as discreet as possible. But judging from the look on Nick's face, he didn't care at all if anyone saw them. That alone liberated Chris, showing the differences between the two men. Nick leaned in and softly kissed Chris' lips, his hand stroking Chris' cheek. They both shivered on contact, the electricity surging between them, and before Chris had a chance to react, Nick pulled away. It was amazing and Chris' whole body was on fire. That small touch was enough to charge him like nothing he'd felt before. "Just something for you to think about Chris." Nick whispered moving to stand up. Chris moved on pure instinct, his hand grabbing Nick's and pulling him back down. There was no fucking way he was letting him get away with just that. Taking advantage of Nick's open mouth, Chris pulled him close and kissed him. His hand moved to the back of Nick's neck, playing idly with the hair at his nape, stroking the skin softly. He could tell the exact instant that Nick became a willing participant, the shock wearing off and beginning to kiss Chris back, their tongues shyly meeting in the middle to stroke and tease one another. The kiss maybe lasted thirty seconds, but gave Chris what he needed to realize that no, Justin Timberlake wasn't the be all end all in the relationship world. Opening his eyes, he watched Nick do the same, happy to see that he'd been just as affected by the kiss. His lips were a pinker plush than usual, cheeks were heated and breathing laboured. Chris figured that Nick had never looked more beautiful than he did right then. When he saw the pleased confusion on Nick's face he shrugged. "I like to have a lot to think about. Makes realizing the obvious easier." Chris smiled and stood up, wanting to get that drink he'd been denied. He figured he'd get the coke minus the rum. The adrenaline pumping through his veins right now was far more powerful than any alcohol he might drink. "When you're over him, give me a call." Nick called out, smile on his face. Chris smiled and nodded, making his way into packed room, feeling better than he'd felt in a long time. His eyes subconsciously scanned the room for Justin. It was something that he did without even thinking and knew he would have to get out of the habit of doing. He was surprised to find him locked in a steamy kiss with his 'friend', not caring who could see them. Instead of being hit with the usual feeling of gut wrenching pain and the world crashing down around him, a vision of Nick's smiling face flashed before his eyes and he could feel the blonde's lips on his own, kissing him sweetly. With shaky hands, he pulled his cell phone from his pocket and dialed 7 numbers, willing his stomach to relax. "Hello?" He heard the voice say, a hint of humour in his voice. "Yeah. So I walk into this room right. And there he is making out with someone in the corner of the room. In plain fucking view of everyone around them." Chris said, watching Justin, knowing that he didn't need to say his name. It was just understood. "And?" Chris could tell that the person was holding their breath, waiting for what was to come next. "And, well all I can think of is you. I mean, yeah. It fucking hurts like hell because he wouldn't even touch me most of the time in public, but here he is with his tongue down the guys' throat. But I don't want to go over and bawl him out and cry like a fucking girl anymore. That's gotta count for something right? What do you think that means?" Chris bit his lip and heard rustling on the other end of the phone. The person was moving and he turned his head to look at the door from which he just walked through. When he saw Nick appear, phone up to his ear and a smile on his face he relaxed considerably. "I think it means we just might have a chance." Nick replied disconnecting the call. Chris shut his phone off as well, his eyes never leaving Nick's. All thoughts of Justin were pushed to the back of his mind and he smiled his first genuine smile in months. Finis